a coincidence of wants
a musing everyday
10.31.2011
this halloween,
i'm hoping the economy rebounds,
like they say, 'the dead will rise.'
10.30.2011
when the full moon rises,
i become an animal with no sense of direction,
a wherewolf
10.29.2011
i started a one-man-band,
but we can't
agree on a name.
10.28.2011
'then the guy grabbed a crow bar.'
'what did he do after that?'
'beats me.'
10.27.2011
raging animals are cute,
when the bull got stuck in the doorway
it was just a door, a bull.
10.26.2011
things just aren't as exciting as they used to be,
when i look out at the night sky,
i'm so over the moon.
10.25.2011
you can't expect the unexpected
except when inspecting
expectations
10.24.2011
when humpty dumpty died
i couldn't
keep it together
10.23.2011
my phone case broke after
five minutes of use,
this is a worst case scenario.
10.22.2011
if i'm trying to get a promotion,
why do you tell me not to
work myself up?
10.21.2011
if you think it's destructive
when the dog plays with its toys indoors,
let's see how it plays out.
10.20.2011
did you hear about the small child
who couldn't get on the roller coaster that closed?
he was too little and too late.
10.19.2011
she only smiles when she's wearing
chinchilla pelts from head to toe.
the fur suit of happiness.
10.18.2011
for as many faces as you have,
i would have thought you'd have one
watching your back.
10.17.2011
my apologies
are not empty,
they're full of sarcasm.
10.16.2011
not to knock on wood or anything,
but i find it to be
too grainy.
10.15.2011
i've only ever had a
frog in my throat,
in a french restaurant.
10.14.2011
when i commit crimes
i wear nothing around my neck,
so i get away, ascot-free.
10.13.2011
going to a fancy hotel
in an exotic location
is not something i'd resort to.
10.12.2011
i have a 'no return' policy
on compliments,
but thanks anyway.
10.11.2011
moses was so shocked that everyone
was worshiping the golden calf idol,
he screamed out 'holy cow!?'
10.10.2011
if you want to see the number 2,
you have to
look after number 1.
10.09.2011
i've never seen a doe resting in this spot,
but i know one thing for sure,
the buck stops here.
10.08.2011
magicians never reveal their secrets,
so never ask one,
' how's tricks? '
10.07.2011
i tend to believe that jokes
about internal organs
are the only real 'inside jokes.'
10.06.2011
rip van winkle
took a nap,
the rest is history.
10.05.2011
when i picked you up
spicy indian food,
it was a curry favour.
10.04.2011
when the devil was punched by god,
he was hit by a
god-given right.
10.03.2011
he said peter's sister
didn't give him any gifts.
his story re: pete's sis, selfish.
10.02.2011
our past is a cold burrito,
sitting by a microwave.
history re-heats itself.
10.01.2011
the world is just a snake
biting it's own tail, over and over.
history re-eats itself.
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