a coincidence of wants
a musing everyday
8.31.2011
if my calculations are correct,
buzz
is the only buzz word in existence.
8.30.2011
twilight vampire
rule of thumb:
once bitten, twice shiny.
8.29.2011
now i aint sayin' she's a gold digger,
but she does happen to head
the world's largest mining company.
8.28.2011
i'm going to try my hardest
not to die,
even if it kills me.
8.27.2011
when the grenade landed near me
i started punching the ground.
i was told to hit the dirt.
8.26.2011
a book
without a reader
is just paper.
8.25.2011
when the piano plummeted from the window
at the school for the deaf,
it fell on deaf ears.
8.24.2011
they thought i knew they wanted
to play one of my board games,
but i didn't have clue.
8.23.2011
when two words that mean the same thing
are placed next to each other,
it's synonymitry.
8.22.2011
i'm sorry i didn't laugh,
i can't take a joke,
and if i could, i don't know where i'd bring it.
8.21.2011
if you've made your bed,
why would you lay in it?
wouldn't that just unmake it?
8.20.2011
when the magician was injured,
they couldn't find anyone else
that would do the trick.
8.19.2011
timmy fell to the bottom of the well.
he tried to climb out,
but he couldn't leave the well enough alone.
when the detective learned
there was a prize in his cereal,
he new he had to get to the bottom of it.
8.18.2011
i often exhale into jars
closing them quickly,
hoping to save my breath.
8.17.2011
when the octogenarian nascar driver
had a wheel blowout mid-race,
he had to retire.
8.16.2011
how can i have regrets,
when i've never once
gretted?
8.15.2011
when the kkk burned that crucifix,
one member bumped into the flames
and was caught in the cross fire.
8.14.2011
to get blood from a stone,
one simply has to
hit someone with it.
8.13.2011
i had a lucky apple,
but after one bite,
it became rotten.
8.12.2011
kanye west has his own private jet.
seems that rappers often give in to
flights of fancy.
8.11.2011
people climbing the berlin wall
would risk being shot,
just to be on the safe side.
8.10.2011
the don gave me one chance
to take his deal.
he made me an offer i couldn't reuse.
8.09.2011
when lucifer's army revolted,
the angels turned to their commander, god.
god said, "give 'em hell!"
8.08.2011
the suicidal man
couldn't afford rope,
so, he was hanging by a thread.
8.07.2011
after years of searching for the box
that contained his love, he found it,
but his heart wasn't in it.
8.06.2011
jimi hendrix was born
with a guitar in his hands,
he cut his own chord.
8.05.2011
kitten and puppy fur,
none the worse
for wear.
8.04.2011
all these errant directory files
need to get
with the program.
8.03.2011
i walked into home depot,
'will you be purchasing anything today?"
'wood if i could.'
8.02.2011
i'm not just whistling dixie,
i'm also whistling
the superman theme.
8.01.2011
i feel bad for the homeless.
they have to traverse our country
with two bum legs.
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