a coincidence of wants
a musing everyday
3.31.2011
we kill each other in the name of faith,
battling for religious supremacy.
i have no god in this fight.
3.30.2011
'after this
life,
resumes normalcy'
3.29.2011
to save his own life, he fought the dolphin.
with his final breath, he killed it.
defeating the porpoise
3.28.2011
it's never wise to ask advice
of the homeless.
beggars can't be choosers.
3.27.2011
in a game of hide and seek,
i hid all by myself,
but you were seeking something else.
3.26.2011
descartes was originally a chef,
'i squash, therefore i yam'
he didn't mince words.
3.25.2011
the moon used to be
as bright as the sun,
until it had the daylights knocked out of it.
3.24.2011
tires filled with musical notes
seemed like a good idea,
until they went flat.
3.23.2011
every so often i reorganize my kitchen furniture.
it feels good to be the one
turning the tables, for once.
3.22.2011
both my thumbs hate each other.
they can never come to an agreement.
they're opposable.
3.21.2011
we should fall in love and rob banks together.
when we escape the authorities,
we'll make out like bandits.
3.20.2011
i'd love to help you
out of your dominatrix uniform,
but my hands are tied.
3.19.2011
she used a permanent marker
to outline her eyes, nose, and mouth.
that way, she'd never lose face.
3.18.2011
this war cost us
an army
and a legacy
3.17.2011
she wanted to stop fighting with him.
so, she buried the hatchet,
right in his chest.
3.16.2011
goonies never say die,
except when they say
that they never say die.
3.15.2011
i think we should start calling
immortals,
non-perishables.
3.14.2011
they wouldn't let me place a $25 bet
at a table with a $50 minimum.
you can't always bet what you want.
3.13.2011
mario is such an asshole,
he's always breaking my bricks
and trying to 1-up me.
3.12.2011
you can lead a horse to water,
but you can't make it
love you.
3.11.2011
in the future, our main food source
will be pills made of pea protein, called soylent green.
soylent green is pea pills.
3.10.2011
i don't think of them
as 'homeless.'
i prefer, 'home free.'
3.09.2011
for cud chewers, meat is the fate,
but what's the fate of you and me
if we just eat what they say?
3.08.2011
the 90-year-old nun
fell down the cathedral stairs. she survived.
'old habits die hard'
3.07.2011
you catch more flies
with honey than with vinegar.
stay away from the fly-infested honey!
3.06.2011
i believe in everything
i'm needing, anything i don't,
i'll be leaving.
3.05.2011
charlie sheen is not an idol.
he is wild thing,
before the braves.
3.04.2011
the local drunk was spilling vodka
down his chin and shirt.
waste not, lest ye be wasted.
3.03.2011
the same thing three times,
the same thing three times,
the sane think there's time,
3.02.2011
when the moon hits your eye
like a big pizza pie,
that's a mess.
3.01.2011
when you see me again,
you'll know
my invisibility pills wore off.
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