9.30.2010

you can fight as hard as you can,

but it won't make life fair.

chewbacca never got a medal.

9.29.2010

she sat in her ivory tower,

ignorant to the fact that its walls

were made of the tusks of a thousand elephants

9.28.2010

we are living longer than ever before,

filling the time, to have it full.

more is less.

9.27.2010

smtms, th wrds dnt fl whl,

ths wrld cnt srvve wtht vwls,

i can't survive without u

9.26.2010

the truth is hard to see,

until you gouge out your eyes.

oedipus was one ignorant mother fucker.

9.25.2010

life doesn't make sense,

the world seems so backwards,

why is chili hot?

9.24.2010

in the game of life,

i try to keep moving forward,

but the spinner broke.

9.23.2010

time is of the essence,

but the essence of time

is procrastination.

9.22.2010

if the world ends in 2012,

i wonder,

does roland emmerich get a royalty check?

9.21.2010

the candle starts to dim,

wax receding down

to the base of a hot tin can.

9.20.2010

if you are what you eat,

then i'm going to start eating

god.

9.19.2010

i killed a man

so i could open a pub in yukon, canada.

what would you do for a klondike bar?

9.18.2010

two peanuts were walking down the street,

one was a-salted.

the mugger stole his cashew.

9.17.2010

you can take the girl out of the trailer park,

but you can't take

her anywhere that uses silverware

9.16.2010

i know how this one ends,

i skipped ahead to the last page,

still doesn't make sense.

9.15.2010

look, up in the sky!

its a bird, its a plane!

oh, it is a bird. no help is coming.

9.14.2010

life's just a big ol' ice cream sundae

and i'd dig in,

if not for my lactose issues.

9.13.2010

i was a recovering alcoholic,

transporting smuggled booze during prohibition,

until i fell off the wagon.

9.12.2010

when i was eight, i filled in every line

of an etch-a-sketch. my dad shook it furiously,

'go outside,' he said.

9.11.2010

if i had a time machine,

i'd go back to before

i had a time machine, if

9.10.2010

i watched as she walked away,

her head never bending back.

the silence said everything.

9.09.2010

life is like a box of chocolates;

only important when there is love.

otherwise, it's just sad.

9.08.2010

i'd only live in a one-horse town,

if that horse were mr. ed,

or a rocket ship.

9.07.2010

i think a carnival trapeze artist

would make the best reporter,

faire and balanced.

9.06.2010

she ran as hard as she could

until her lungs gave out, and she fell,

back where she started.

9.05.2010

whoever said,

'a watched pot never boils'

never saw superman's heat vision.

9.04.2010

does the grim reaper

make his own clothing,

reaping in what he sews?

9.03.2010

i tread softly,

slipshod steel tip toeing

down the yellow brick road.

9.02.2010

i ignored a man at the airport

pushing michael jackson hair dolls,

the homeless here are far more creative.

9.01.2010

ending old beginnings

that beg to be ended,

beginning new endings, again.